Love.

I'm holding baby in my arms and he is softly playing with my hair or patting my arm and his eyelids are fluttering shut and he's almost asleep, I'm singing softly to him or humming lightly, we're rocking back and forth, it's so hot I can barely breathe, sometimes there is a fan easing the heat, sometimes the heat is what makes it so real. I can't help but feel that there is no other place for me in the world. That a small child was always meant to be in my arms, just like that. Like there has never been anything more right in the world. A perfect moment created by our lovely Lord.

I'm sitting on the floor or in a chair.. any daily task and Dana walks by and softly runs her hand through my hair as she passes. It's like my hair was put on my head just for little girls to play with.
I can't even explain how perfect it feels.

I'm reading my bible or a book or writing an email and baby comes over and rests his head on my lap. He stays there for a moment and then he goes back to playing. He just needed a second of love.

I'm feeding him breakfast, lunch, dinner... and in between bites he reaches over and wraps his little arms around me and squeezes. It's maple syrup kisses. It's peanut butter and jelly kisses. It's rice all over the place but I don't even care because it's worth it.

I'm coloring picture after picture with Dana and Josette. And we're discussing what colors should be used for what.

It's the stark contrast between the color of our skin. Even that feels right. It's inexplicable. 

I'm teaching Dana the difference between 'he' and 'she' and she's getting them wrong on purpose and we laugh and laugh like it's the funniest thing that has ever happened.

It's bath time and baby is giggling and trying to drink the bath water.

It's getting ready for church and my girls telling me how beautiful I am. And it's me looking back at them, not even being able to think because they are so gorgeous and their lovely lives are now full of hope because of who our God is. 

I'm playing peek-a-boo over and over again.

I'm cleaning scraped knees and bandaging boo-boos.

It's changing diapers and changing diapers and changing diapers.

I'm kissing cheeks and foreheads and whispering softly the words "Goodnight" and "I love you, Jesus loves you, Mommy loves you, Daddy loves you."

I'm praying for these precious little ones. I'm praying and praying and praying that they will fall in love with Jesus and follow His perfect plan for their lives.

My heart is so full.

I'm going to miss this.

But oh, this is what the rest of my life is going to look like in some way, shape or form.

Love. Love. Love.

So that they might know the love of their beautiful, heavenly Father.